Single-Mooning: Falling back in love with oneself one day at a time

I've been wrestling in this area probably my whole life. I have an extreme Type A personality, so to me, if I see something and I want it, what possible obstacle could block me from it? I set a goal, make the schedules and charts and go after it. What could possibly go wrong, right? Ha! Maturity and life have taught me that you can want something and it can be 100% good for you but if the timing isn't right , it's better not to have that thing at all. Remember being a child and wishing you could drive? You just knew you could handle it and it was as simple as turning a wheel? Then you get older and realize there's a bigger level of knowledge to it-- like turn signals, freeways, 4 way stop signs and oh yeah, speed limits that you probably couldn't have handled had someone given you keys at the age of 9. The desire was there but the capacity to handle the responsibly of it was not. My friends will often hear me use the cake analogy. I can have all the right i...

Single. One word. Sounds simple right? "Single" ideally means not married, not separated, not in a relationship, not "it's complicated." In short, it means: not taken. But guess what single does NOT mean? AVAILABLE. That's right. Now, say it with me: Single does not mean available!! A person could very well be single and still not be in a position where they are ready to date you, let alone be in a relationship with you. Twice this year alone I've been encountered by two individuals who by all intents and purposes are single. No one sleeps at their homes but them, no one has the title "girlfriend," and when it's tax season, they get to mark that cute little box that says,  "Single," on their tax form. But our brief dealings quickly reminded me of one simple truth. We often get so lovestruck that we tend to forget: single just does not mean available. For one individual (let's call him Bryant), though his best ...

So for some strange reason I accepted the 30 day "Blog Like Crazy" Challenge so lucky you----you're going to hear from me more this month than ever before. You can expect posts that make you cry, posts that make you laugh, posts that make you think or any combination of the three,lol! So for this first post, I thought we'd go back to the basics, what made me start blogging in the first place a few years ago- heartbreak. If you've never had your heart broken or been disappointed by the way a relationship (or situationship) ended, you're one of the lucky ones. For the rest of us, if we're honest, we've been there, and for many of us, we've been down that road more than once. So what happens next? What happens after she tells you that it's over and wants to just be friends? What happens after he moves on while your head is still calculating exactly where it all went wrong? What happens when the song you deemed "our song," comes o...

The directive was simple. “Go into the land and preach repentance.” Simple right? Go where you’re told to go and tell the people to stop their foolish ways and follow God. You’ve probably guessed by now that I’m talking about our good friend, Jonah, from the Bible and BEFORE you stop reading and dismiss the rest of this text, BEFORE you say, “I’ve heard this story a million times from vacation Bible school,” I entreat you to keep reading. Here’s why: We tend to oversimplify Jonah and his journey.   Many of us look at his story and roll our eyes with indignation that God gave Jonah such a simple task and Jonah chose not to obey.   Surely he deserved that punishment of enduring the belly of a fish, we think to ourselves. We look at Jonah and think, how dare he NOT go preach and do what God asked of him. We say to ourselves, I would have done what God said in a heartbeat. But would you? Jonah’s command from God was to go and preach repentance. What was the...

The Magic City Classic is a big deal for my alma mater. This is the time we come together once a year to play against our biggest rival. We look forward to the tailgating, the playful trashtalking, the bands battling for a year of bragging rights, and somewhere in there I might even see a little football. Even more than that, though, this is the time of year I get a little nostalgic, pondering on not just the memories I made in undergrad, but the lessons I learned. The one that has came into play most predominately last week, and even the first part of today, is courtesy of a woman whose name I do not even recall. She came to speak to our accounting class about what it's like to work for the US Treasury and gave some key points about internships and career choices. But the one take away I got from her lecture did not even have anything to do with accounting--- it had to do with life. In her closing, she stated, " There is no such thing as a bad day, only a character buildi...

My mind often goes back to the Biblical story of the Israelites. I think it's because at any given moment, you may find me actively standing in one of their pairs of shoes. I might be in the shoe where I am captive, the labor is hard and I'm just hoping and praying that the Lord will see the sweat of my brow and soon rescue me. I might be in the shoe where God is delivering me, avenging on my behalf and I can clearly see His hand of favor and protection moving in my life. I might be in the shoe where I have made it to the Promised Land and I'm praising with timbrel and dance when I look back and see how the Lord has brought me over...... Or I might be in the shoe where I'm between captivity and the Promised Land and because I can't see the victory ahead and because the distance seems long or even "impossible" (as if anything is too hard for God), I allow myself to look back at my captivity and romanticize it. Have you ever been there? Where...

Hey Readers, guess what?!? If you're reading this, we made it through yet another cuffing season! Yay us!! ***Insert happy dance! How did it go? Did you find yourself watching Hallmark Channel marathons with Kleenex and popcorn at hand? Did you get together with your girls for an epic "Gal-entine's Day" of dinner and mani-pedi's? I had my usual heart-shaped pizza and spent the evening with people I hold close to me, laughing and dancing up a storm.  Of course, no cuffing season would be complete without those random texts from people I hadn't spoken to in months (one person even from more than a year ago) and then that in turn led to another exciting round of hitting that oh-so-powerful "block" button.  One thing was different this year though, one text that stuck out more than the others. This one was from a current potential suitor who said, "I have a Valentine gift for you, when can I bring it by?"  This was quite a change f...

Happy 2018 Dear Readers! We talked a little bit about cuffing season in my last post and I mentioned that instead of filling the void with all kinds of toxic stuff (Lifetime movies, food binging, alcohol, meaningless flings, fill in your blank here ____________), I'm surrounding myself with positive people and living my glass-half-full, golden life to the fullest. So for those that requested a list, here's a starting point for you. But don't stop here, think outside of the box and do something that works for YOU, something that brings YOU joy! And you can do these with friends, accountability partners, siblings, etc, whatever you do, don't pick up the phone and call that ex. Okay? Okay! Let's goooooo: Read a new book (Try "I Am #8" by John Gray; "I-Factor" by Van Moody; "Wholeness" by Toure Roberts, "Prepare and Position Yourself Devotional" by Charissa T or ask a friend for a recommendation) . Start/join a book club ...

Good morning, readers! Wanted to interrupt your day with this little newsflash: When people walk out of your life, it is NOT a reflection of YOUR LACK OF VALUE--- Instead, it is a reflection of their own inability to recognize how unbelievably, immeasurably valuable you are!!! Never forget you are a prize and your worth is NEVER tied up in the ones who walk away (job, friend, relative, significant other, opportunity). You are a WHOLE human being and they can't take any more of you with them than you allow. In other words, missing your peace? Don't allow it. Missing your joy? Don't allow it! Missing your hope? Don't allow it. Don't let anyone or anything make you feel like a fraction of the absolute greatness that you truly are. Okay, now back to your regularly scheduled programming!